Friday, February 18, 2011

Congresswoman Michele Bachmann's Gas Attack

Congresswoman Michele Bachmann (R-MN) farted in an elevator in Saint Paul, MN and proves she has no manners because she is American.

I've heard everything now. God gave her gas, wow. I think He gave her a lot of hot air, too. Funny story unless you were one of the 3 kids at nose level in the elevator. They probably thought it was a terrorist attack. Since when does being American mean you don't have to have manners? Passing gas is natural, but if you do it on an elevator, you should at least say excuse me, especially if it is the trumpet variety as in this instance. I'm not even going to discuss the moral dilemma people face if their farts are silent but deadly. Many people won't apologize for those because the blame will usually fall on the fattest, oldest or youngest person in the elevator. All accusing eyes will search them out. I know because I'm usually the guy people think perpetrated the act. Oh, I'll try to send, "It wasn't me" looks back, but that always makes me look more guilty.
Following simple rules at this point, I will come out and say, "Why are you all looking at me? I didn't do it." I might even declare, "If I did it you'd hear it and know it was me. I would apologize." At this point the real culprit is never going to step forward to excuse themselves which leads me to my next rule. If I'm with my wife and I suspect she actually did the deed then I'm likely to jump on the grenade and claim that which is not mine. I'll step up and say, "Sorry." I can read my wife, but if I'm wrong then I can usually spot the real guilty party at once. The person with the perplexed look on his or her face when someone else claimed the fart that wasn't really theirs is priceless. Well enough on this subject, it stinks.

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